I saw my two main men yesterday, the extremely lovely Dr Marguerie (consultant physiscian and rheumatologist) and the devilishly handsome Dr Clarke. (consultant cardiologist) I have a very close relationship with both of my consultants mainly because they don’t get many emergency admissions into the Warwickshire Nuffield and these chaps helped me when I was taken ill with Atrial Flutter at the end of 2006, whilst I was attending a physio session.

It was a bit scary at the time, but at long last we (as in my cardiologist and I, we) were able to pin point exactly what my witterings about feeling a bit odd at times were really all about.

I always get a bit (well rather alot) wound up before seeing doctors. I am an extremely good patient, treat the doctors and nurses with the respect they deserve, do not have the nurses running around doing stuff that I could do or could do without, but inside I feel like a bowl of jelly and am always very emotional. So I packed plenty of hankies and knitting. (of course!)

There were plenty of tears in both consultations, both of these chaps made me feel good about myself and gave good advice about dealing with grief (we are talking hairloss) and to to be easy on myself, have fun and what a lovely personality I have. Mostly I see a grumpy, depressed middle aged woman, but they see something different, it made me smile and I managed a little giggle with both of them. I was surprised to learn that I should give myself two to three years to grieve and come to terms with my hairloss. Now someone has said that to me it has made some sense to me.

Dr Clarke is changing my medication back to Flecanide from Solotal just incase that is affecting my mood. He had changed it to Solotal just incase the flecanide was causing my alopecia, but I think we have firmly established that it isn’t but now the Solotal could be keeping me a little low, so Flecanide might be better for me. I’m hoping that and some spring sunshine (she says hopefully) should lift me enough that I can stop contemplating taking anti depressents. I really don’t want to go down that particular route, so fingers crossed.

And the lovely Dr Marguerie and I discussed my CRP levels which remain at 20, they should be in a range of 1 to 4. I discussed the numbness in my left hand again, which has been going on for over a year. He did a couple of tests and we discovered that I have lost sensation in my index finger, so just to be on the safe side, he’s going to book me in for some electrical tests on my nerves in my left hand, he thinks its carpal tunnel syndrome. I also discussed with him how my gait has changed this year. I find it very difficult to pin point exactly what it is, but my left leg does not place itself so accurately as it once did. With a few expert questions we discoverer that I have pain on the outside of my left leg and that I stagger down the stairs in the morning. Its funny isn’t it how we develop coping strategies without even realising that we are doing so. He feels its probably tendonitis which can be related to the autoimmune system, which we all know its what I do best. This might be causing my CRP levels to remain so high… so we may have an answer to that mystery… We are just going to do the ibuprofen route as and when on this one.

On a positive note, I showed him my skin on my left hand, explaining at the same time that I had eliminated gluten from my diet and how my excema had cleared up. He can remember seeing how dreadful my hand was so he was most impressed and gave me the green light to continue. I might even be able to wear my wedding, engagement and eternity rings for the first time in years if my skin remains clear and strong. Its still too weak to try but in a few months the skin might be strong enough to test it out.

And in another hospital Dad saw his anesthetist. He has a tough decision to make about whether he proceeds with his knee operation. They have discovered that his heart valves still leak so there is a risk to him. Its a small risk, but it is there.

I’d just like to say thank you to my two main blog readers who left such lovely messages when we lost Bramble. Son no.2 has been extremely quiet this week, almost too quiet. All I can do is keep my eye on him.

I also get to kick the patients back to work this morning. Hubby and son no.1 have been struck low by a virus since Sunday, so today I will have a cough free zone.